HONEST

Who doesn't crave or demand honesty from the people around us? We all want that, right? The question is, are we being honest ourselves? More often than not, we tend to hide the truth because we believe that it's the best thing to do. Lies became our escape to protect ourselves from the pain or the judgment of the world. It becomes our shield from the prying eyes that constantly hovers around us. It is awful to surround ourselves with lies, but sometimes, it's the only way to keep us safe.

Josh Cullen once again played with the painful reality of life with the second track from his album, Lost & Found. The song title, Honest, makes you wonder if he is being honest to all of us? The answer is probably no. With the life he lived, it wouldn't be surprising for him to have demons constantly lurking in the shadows waiting to haunt him when he least expected it. Josh is a genuine man, but even he must have some things in his life that he doesn't share with us, especially his deepest thoughts. Could we blame him?

Being an open book means people know everything about you, giving them the opportunity to poke their noses where it doesn't belong. It would be an indirect approval or consent to be judged in everything you do, but with his upcoming album, it seems like Josh is finally destroying the barriers he built around him, crashing the walls, and opening himself up completely. I wonder how terrifying this must be for him. How much courage does it take to bear his soul, unfiltered and uncensored?

Pilit pinipinta ang aking sigla

Ngunit hindi naman tunay ang tawa

Lagi na lang, kailangan ba may daya?

'To ba ay masisisi kung ayaw ko na umahon? (Umahon)

Pagod na akong lokohin ang sarili (Ah-ah)

Gusto nang bitawan ang pekeng mukha

We all go through this. Wearing a mask to hide what we truly feel because what is the sense of showing your true emotions? No one would care or even dare to understand. They all expect us to be okay, happy, and mentally balanced. Nobody would even ask how we're doing even if they know we're going through tough times. We don't have any other choice but to be okay, because that's what's expected of us. So we lie.

If I'm being honest

I've been lying my whole life

If I'm being honest

I've been two-faced in most times

If I'm being honest (Honest)

I've been lying the whole time

If I'm being honest (Honest)

I've been lying my whole life (Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh)

I've been lying my whole life (Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh)

We don't always realize that we've been lying to everyone, even to ourselves because being honest about our feelings only gets us hurt. When we open up ourselves, there's an expectation that somehow people would care. They will finally see our sufferings and they will at least empathize, even for just a bit. In the end, all we will get is nothing. Sometimes people would ask us how we're doing, not because they care, but because they just want to know what's happening to us. They just want to gossip.

Ngayon nakahiga sa sahig

With all these voices captured my head

Bakit palagi na lang gustong ubusin?

Kahit walang ginawa kung 'di ang sundin

Hindi nakapagtabi sa sarili

So please, someone help me to get out this mess

The pressure and the stress

Honest to God, I need somebody to hold my hand

I'm sick and tired of all the false pretense

Pagod na sa pagkukunwari,

The common cause of mental health issues is the pressure around us. You have to be successful before you reach a certain age, be married and have children, own a house, bank accounts, cars, and estate. You're supposed to follow in your parents' footsteps, take the same course they did, and have the same job. If our siblings are dean's listers, we can't be left behind or we would never hear the end of it. Living this kind of life is exhausting and it will surely take a toll on our mental health. Then, there is the expectation of society.

You need to act, react to things, and handle every situation a certain way, because society expects you to be a well-mannered adult. People will gaslight you, push you to your limits, and then call you a bad person if you react negatively. They will take everything you can give and leave you when they're done, yet in the end, it will still be your fault why they left. While you will act as if you're not affected because you need to show that you're strong.

It's an endless game, and no matter what we do, we will always end up losing. So we lie to hide the truth and protect ourselves. We keep doing it and eventually, the lies become the truth. Without realizing it, we believe in our lies, too. We smile through the pain as if we feel nothing, we hold our heads up high through the storm as if we're not terrified because it's the only choice we have.